Lisa, 47, US
Your website has given me inspiration and hope for starting a family after age 40 and the reassurance I am not alone in this desire. Today is my 47th birthday and here is my story.
I was a late bloomer; I had always hoped to marry and have children but didn't meet the right guy and make this happen until age 43. My husband was 50 at the time, also never married, but surprisingly open to the possibility of children. Within the first year of trying I got pregnant twice, only to miscarry both times early on. We saw a fertility specialist. They did the standard fertility testing on me which indicated that while my ovarian reserve was by no means exhausted, it was borderline. I was told that my chance of achieving a successful pregnancy at 44 on my own or by IVF was very slim, less than 5%. Considering the cost of one IVF cycle those were pretty terrible odds. During the same visit, my doctor raised the subject of IVF using a donor egg. I remember how shocking and weird this idea seemed at the time. But over the next few months we came to the conclusion that it was the most acceptable option for us. We worked with an agency and fertility clinic to select an anonymous donor and prepare for the embryo transfer. A pair of embryos were transferred to me in March 2005 and 2 weeks later I was pregnant!.
After a magnificent, uncomplicated pregnancy our son was born in December 2005, one month shy of my 45th birthday. He is the light of our lives. Here's where my story gets interesting; About a year later we decided to do another IVF cycle with the last pair of frozen embryos from our first donor cycle. I went to my doctor for a routine sonogram just before starting the IVF cycle and was astonished when the sonographer announced that I was already about 5 weeks pregnant! My emotions fluctuated between joy one minute to absolute certainty that I would miscarry again. The next sonogram detected a heartbeat. I still refused to be optimistic. But each sonogram over the coming weeks gave way to more and more happiness. Then we had a setback. During early prenatal testing they detected that my placenta had some cells with the extra Downs Syndrome chromosome. They would have to do an amniocentesis to know for sure whether the fetus also had Downs Syndrome and that test couldn't be done for about 5 weeks. That period was the most difficult time in my life.
The happy news is that amniocentesis confirmed that the fetus was normal. The rest of my pregnancy was smooth and I gave birth to another son in June 2007. Wyatt turns seven months old today and it's also my 47th birthday. Both of our boys are miracle children in different ways. What I've learned is that things can come to you in unexpected ways, Statistics are just numbers and it's possible to beat the odds. Never give up on your hopes and dreams.
Posted 25 January 2008
Sheri, 46
My husband and I have been married for more than 26 years when we decided we simply weren't done having children. We had five children at that time and ....wait forit.....4 grandchildren! People I'm sure thought we were crazy since our children were all grown up (the youngest was 14) and were ready to start thinking about going easy. But after having fulfilled all my dreams of having children, graduating college, having two different careers, traveling in several other countries.....the one thing that I was most proud of and had done the best was having my children. We were ready for more babies in the house. I did get pregnant at 45 and miscarried but became pregnant only 2 months later. It was a pregnancy that was very, very different from my others, but nothing that was scary-different, actually I believe it was easier. I carried alot of amniotic fluid this time, and my legs swelled alot....but had no morning sickness or backache like I had with the other ones.
We decided to have a homebirth. Most people expressed worry at that suggestion, saying I needed to be close to a hospital. The only reason they could give me was because of my "age". What's age got to do with it? If I am able to get pregnant, carry a baby and deliver a baby at 45 then obviously I am not too old to have a baby!
I went into labor on a bright sunny beautiful September morning and had our beautiful Christian at 9:00 that evening. While he did have problems having aspirated blood into his lungs, that had nothing to do with my age nor with a homebirth. He also had shoulder distocia and our midwife knew exactly what to do to help him naturally out of the birth canal (as opposed to the c-section the doctor at the hospital would have done). As for the actual birth, there wasn't anything harder about it at 45 than at 25. IN fact, I was probably alot more stoic about it 45 and could deal with better having experienced a great many things over the years that a younger inexperienced girl would not have.
We do not currently practice any birth control although I do believe the breastfeeding is keeping my cycle away (yes, you CAN successfully breast feed at 46!). My husband's grandmother had her last baby at 52! If I do get pregnant again, I will let you know! I would love to.
Posted 19 February 2008
Sue, 42, Australia
Hi My Name is Sue and l am 42, I was married for 15 years and was on the IVF program in Melbourne to try for a baby once l was told l couldn't normally and needed the program due to left tube being blocked and none ovulating periods. I was on the ivf for 5 years each time told heart breaking news, sorry not this time. By the year 2000 l couldn't take anymore heart ache so stopped the program. Not long after my married fell apart as for abuse from my husband so l left and started over.
I was single for some time and started a new life and thought to myself it was time to get over the idea of ever being a mother. I moved back to Bendigo from Kyneton after my married break up to be closer to my family. Got myself a job and then September the 21st 2007 l met a new man who stole my heart and we have been seeing each other since. Anyway the 5th of April 2008 l had very sore breasts and had been for fours weeks and period was late, but l never use to worry about that as that was nothing new. But for some reason l felt l should do a test so l went and got a home pregnancy test and done it to my shock it had two lines saying l was pregnant. I was in disbelief.
So Monday 7th April 2008 l went to my doctor and he sent me for a blood test and told me to ring him later that afternoon for the results. SO l rang him back at 2:30 to hear him say Sue you are very pregnant. I went quiet for a moment and l said, WHAT??? He said yes you heard right. Then all the questions ran through my head; like how l was told l couldn't fall in and after all these years you're telling me l am when l had forgotten all about ever being a mum years ago.
So l am 10 to 11 weeks at the moment and still having trouble believing it; it still has not sunk in. Yes l am over the moon about it and the feeling of becoming a mother at last has blown me away. But l am also scared at the same time and not knowing what to expect.
I have read some other women's stories on your page and has given me a smile knowing l am not alone in being in my 40's and having my first baby. Well done ladies!!!
Posted 11 April 2008
