Jo, 40, Almeria, Spain
Hi, I have just discovered that at forty I am pregnant and it has come as quite a surprise. I am now feeling a lot more positive ( I guess that's the hormones kicking in ) but do have some misgivings about being such an old Mum as I already felt old when taking my other two boys to school. I would love to hear from other Mums who are in the same position or who have had a baby later in life and their experiences.
Posted 2 January 2006
Dricky, 42, Roodepoort, Gauteng, South Africa
Is there anyone out there who has had a successful Tubal Ligation Reversal Op? With which Dr, Area & Cost involved??
I am 42 and desperate. I live in Roodepoort, Gauteng, South Africa.
Posted 2 January 2006
GC, 44, Florida, US
I have a daughter who is 4 years of age and she is the love of my life. I adopted her when she was 2 yrs of age. I have always wanted to conceive a child and when I was about 27 or perhaps 28 years of age, it did happen. Unfortunately, I had a miscarriage and it has never happened again. I would like to meet someone and perhaps "do the right thing", but at this time of my life, I think that going to a sperm bank is my last chance. I would certainly like to try and see what would happen. In January of 2006, I surgery for fibroids and I also found out that I had endometriosis. My right ovary is partial and I have a complete left ovary. The doctor told me that it's not impossible, but I might need a donor egg and some sperm. Well, if that's so, then I'm ready. I would like to communicate with anyone in the same situation, or anyone who has any sound words of advice.
Posted 10 December 2006
Dawn, 44, Petaluma, California, US
I have no children at this time, but my partner and I have just started trying to get pregnant. I am currently 44, and any child I conceive now or soon would be born when I am 45. We really have only been trying for about 2 menstrual cycles (with the blessings of my general practice and OB doctors) to get pregnant. However, I'd like to email with others in my position, as I am not sure when I might consider checking into infertility issues and treatments, given my age.
I work in the field of educational research and evaluation, and spend a lot of time doing that in science and children's museums. I work from home and a small office I share with 2 other women, here in Petaluma, California in the U.S. I enjoy hiking, gardening, reading, and having good conversations.
I really look forward to getting in touch with other women who are trying, and who have been successful, in getting pregnant at my age.
Posted 30 November 2006
Billie, 42, Forney, TX, US
I am 42 and the mother of (4), ages 20, 18, 16, and 15. Last month I found out that I was pregnant, a shock, but excited. Several days later I miscarried. I have been devastated over this and am considering trying to have a baby. Would like to connect with someone close to my age with grown children in the same or close situation.
Posted 29 November 2006
Belinda 45, Isleton, CA USA
I have two children; Abigail Rose age 8 and Tyler James age 6. My husband had a vasectomy shortly after the birth of our son. Then shortly after our son turned a year I realized we had made a mistake when I began to want another child. Unfortunately my husband didn’t think we had made a mistake. He definitely did not want any more children and refused to get a reversal. Well after praying for almost 5 years that God would either change my husband’s heart to want another child or change my heart so I wouldn’t, low and behold two months ago my husband’s heart was changed!! October 30th he had a reversal! I know at 45 I have no guarantee of getting pregnant but I can’t help but feel confident that God will give me my hearts desire to the praise of His glory.
Now here’s the really good part. Since I have been telling more people about this desire I have met or heard of several women well in their 40’s that are pregnant. In fact, a woman I became friends with recently who is 44 just gave birth to an 8.3# son today and she did nothing special to get pregnant other than lots of prayer!
God Bless you all.
Posted 14 November 2006
Catherine, 43, New Zealand with one 9 month old boy (Updated)
We have a 12 month old boy. We are trying for a sibling. The first pregnancy I was 41 at conception and it took only a few tries. This time was the same (in spite of the fact I am still feeding him at night). However we think the pregnancy might be a 'blighted ova'. Sounds terrible doesn't it? What it means is that the supply side of the deal (placenta, yolk sac etc is developing normally but the embryo didn't get off the ground). I am still waiting for confirmation of this. Does anyone know more about the problem; specifically 1. Is it more common in older women and is it likely to be repeated? 2. Is the best thing to have a D and C or wait for a natural miscarriage? (Given time is precious and we will want to try again or maybe go for IVF).
PS Sorry to the lady that contacted and was deleted 'cos she wasn't recognised as a regular and went into Spam. If you reply could you please mark in subject something like 'pregnancy over 40'.
Posted 12 November 2006
Kelly, 46, Melbourne, Australia
Hi, For those women over 45 who have given up having a child - don't ! I am eight weeks' pregnant and will be turning 46 in November. I'm still in shock as I conceived naturally. I had my first child at 38 and second at 39 without any problems, in fact first go. I am in a new relationship and my partner and I started trying about six months. However, as nothing was happening, we both decided that we were blissfully happy with each other and he was content being a step-dad. Bingo! a month later we are pregnant. Not sure if this had anything to do with it, but during the time we were trying my periods were incredibly heavy and I was diagnosed with a 'bulky uterus'. I had a curette to remedy the condition and fell pregnant during the next ovulation. Perhaps my bulky uterus was causing the problem. My doctor couldn't say for sure. I had a scan at 6 wks 5 days and our baby which is smaller than a pea is in the right spot and has a heartbeat. We have a long road ahead and we're keeping a positive outlook.
I would love to hear from other mums who live in Melbourne who are in this special 'older' mums club. I already feel a member as I had my other children in my late 30's so I'm older than most of the mums at school and in mothers group. It's never bothered me.
Posted 9 November 2006
I am 45, going to be 46 in December, and for the first time I have missed my monthly ? I seem to have all the signs of pregnant but I am not sure if it is menopause ? I took a test when I was five days late - it was from the dollar store, and it was neg. Now I am 10 days late! I understand that you have the same symptoms either way - tender boobs, a heavy feeling and just not feeling well. I also have had a small amount of clear discharge that when dry went white? Can anyone offer any advice?
Posted 27 October 2006
Carolyne, 42, UK
Hi, my name is Carolyne and I am 42 years old living in the UK. After years of my mother telling me never to have children as they ruin your life (I am an only child) and my mum is a bit of a control freak, I have just realised that this is not my wish it is hers. My husband and I would dearly love to have a baby but I dont know if it is too late as I have been told I am in early stages of menopause. Also, I have an underactive thyroid and celiac disease (can't eat wheat or gluten products). I also take anti-depressants due to the emotional guilt my mum heaps on me for not living in her home town. A few months ago I was given Clomid to take at certain days of my period but the problem is I havent had a period. Would I still be able to get IVF. What are my options? I would desperately love some advice as I have no-one else to talk to who would understand. I have been told I am too old for NHS treatment and I would have to go private. Can anyone give me advice or am I chasing an impossible dream.
Posted 22 October 2006
Linda, 45, Frankfurt, Germany
My daughter was born in Feb. 2003, 3 months before my 42nd birthday following a missed abortion in October 2001. I have since been trying for a second child, had another missed abortion in Sep. 2004, another (twins) in Sep. 2005 (one had Trisomie 14) . Have had genetic counselling, all OK. I have been trying to conceive again since then, my doctor thought my tubes could be blocked and wanted to do a laparoscopy. But then I was suddenly confronted 3 months ago with another totally unexpected problem, no ovulation, increased FH levels (33 on day 10 in cycle). Have been to see a specialist and he has prescribed me hormone replacement therapy which may or may not kick-start my ovaries again. Have to wait 2 cycles.
I am now feeling very confused about what to do. Is this really the end, should I just give up? Would I have been better going straight for IVF? I would like to hear from anyone else with similar experience.
Posted 22 October 2006
Gabriela, 33, Canada
My name is Gabriela and I am 33 almost 34 years old. I like your site and it is very helpful. Although I am not over 40, I am trying to conceive and I would like to contact othr mothers and know how they achieve healthy pregnancies and feelings. Thank you very much!
Posted 18 October 2006
Hi, I really want to get pregnant again, but my husband says I'm too old!!! I have a three year old who is perfect and I know that I have young eggs. They say that anyone who conceives after 39 is likely a centerian (a person who will live to be over 100) and that they have a younger than usual reproductive system.
I am 43, so now I am thinking I would like to go to a fertility clinic and just do it by myself without my husband's knowledge. Isn't that awful? However, the desire to have another baby overrides my desire to tell the truth to my husband. Can anyone relate? Thanks Nikita.
Posted 16 October 2006
Debbie, 46, UK
I have been on the egg donor list and was offered a donor on two occasions while I was still having IVF, but I have always hoped I would be able to use my own (I am 46 now).
I know if I accepted a donor I would get a donor within 2 months as I am at the top of the list. But I have so many questions and also feel it would not be a true sibling for my son. I then look at other babies and wonder if I would love it as much as my son. My answer is always that I would, but the donor egg doubts just won't go away. I would like to communicate with anyone who has any experiences of egg donation to share.
Posted 4 October 2006
Kelly, 45, Melbourne, Australia
I am 46 in November and I'm eight weeks' pregnant. For all those women in their mid forties trying to conceive, don't give up on your dream. I almost did. Although I had my first child at 38 and the second at 39 without any problems, I knew falling at 45 was a long-shot. I'm with a new partner who doesn't have children, so it's something I wanted to try for him and I always wanted a third child. We tried for about six months with no success and then decided it wasn't meant to be. Perhaps it was relieving ourselves of that stress of waiting each month and then the disappointment. Also during those six months I was having incredibly heavy periods after years of relatively light bleeding. I was diagnosed with a bulky uterus and had a curette to remedy the problem. During my next ovulation which was two weeks after the procedure, I conceived. Who knows if that had anything to do with it but I wonder if an egg was able to attached itself to the uterus while it was in that state. I know we have a challenging seven months or so ahead of us but we're staying positive. The many wonderful stories I've read on this site have given me hope that all will be fine, you have to think that way.
All the best to the older mums who are pregnant and for those trying to conceive, don't give up. I would love to make contact with any older mums in their early to mid forties who have had babies or like me, are on this amazing journey.
Posted 20 September 2006
Faith, 39, Tampa, Florida, US
Hi - my name is faith and I am 39 years old (will be 40 in October). I do not have any children as I have spent so much time waiting for Mr Right. He finally came into my life and we were married April, 09 of 2006. It will be 6 months in Oct. that we've been trying to have a baby. I have high prolactin which is one of the reasons I haven't been able to conceive. I was told by three docters that I didn't need to go on medication, as long as I was getting my period. I explained to them that my periods were starting to change. I went from getting my period 5 days, to 3 days, to 2 days, and now 1 day. They were very light, and that was not normal for me. I bought the clearblue monitor and it revealed no ovulation for the last two months.
My husband and I went to fertility & reproduction medicine fertility Dr. He ran a bunch of tests. Blood work on my hormones levels, my LH is at 9%. He said once LH reaches 10% it will be harder for us to conceive. I also got the Hystrosalpingogram done, and that came back normal. Praise God! Everything came back fine, but my prolactin was at 77 which is considered high - normal is 20. He gave me bromocriptine 2.5 mg to take every night; it will be a week on Monday.
My husband had blood work done, and a semen analysis done. His sperm morphology came back as being low. But, its not impossible for us to get pregnant once my prolactin levels go down.
My Dr. wants to go straight to IVF because he says of my age. I'm a little worried because I haven't heard that it works the first time around, and it's very expensive.
I would like to hear from anyone else who has found themselves in the same situation and could give me any advice or support.
Posted 19 September 2006
Hana, 46, New Zealand
I would like to connect with older women trying to conceive, particularly those who have conceived successfully after the age of 46.
Posted 17 September 2006
Debbie, Hampshire, UK
Hi, my name is Debbie aged 44, 45 in Dec 06. I have been married for many years and had four wonderful children and have five grandchildren. My first baby though I sadly lost aged 7 weeks of a cot death. My children are a boy 27 a girl 24 and the last o boy of which he was born at 29 weeks premature, now aged 19 yrs. When my last son was two I decided to go ahead and be sterilised - a bitter regret now though. After many years of marriage, it failed and ended in divorce. I swore I'd never remarry. That was until I met Mr Wonderful. We have been together five happy years and married for two. He is 17 yrs younger than myself and has no children. We would love to have our own baby so we decided to see my GP who referred us to our local fertility clinic to see if I'd be able to have my operation reversed. No via to IVF. The clinic has done many of tests for us, but as for IVF treatment we have to go private. Then it comes down to the same old thing - age, egg donation etc. Well, after much thought we have decided to try for IVF next year when we can raise the cost of treatment. I am lucky to have an egg donor if needed - my daughter. My family have been very supportive, although I'd love to use my own eggs if they’re not past there sell by date! I have done much research into IVF etc. It’s just finding the correct clinic. So glad I now don’t feel alone and found this site and would love to hear from others in a similar situation. One thing we do have is life - the most precious gift of all, so let’s all live it to the full no matter what our age take care to all. Let’s follow our hearts.
Posted 9 September 2006
Jenny, Bristol, UK
My husband and I have been trying for a family for 5 years. I have lost count of how many miscarriages I have had but I have had 3 this year.
Also because of our age our local NHS fertility clinic are not helping us. I have been told by a fertility counsellor I have no maternal instincts (evidence??), my eggs are rubbish (no test has ever been done on us to confirm this), we are too old for IVF (one lady was pregnant at 62), and to p*** off. This was after one session.
I don't know if there are any other women been through the same as me. We feel so isolated, lonely and unsupported.
Posted 7 September 2006
Ola, 39, London, UK
My name is Ola and I am 39 years old (will be 40 in October). I do not have any children as I have spent so much time waiting for Mr Right. Recently , out of sheer desperation, I joined a website for women looking for sperm donors. If I conceive I want my child to know his/her father even if I am not in a relationship with the donor. I recently started emailing someone who could be a good possible donor. However I have no idea as to how to proceed and I would like to hear from anyone else who has found themselves in the same situation and could give me any advice or support.
Posted 26 August 2006
Maureen, 43, Manchester, UK
My name is Maureen, I am 43 and live in Manchester, UK. I married my husband on my 40th birthday and we have been trying for a baby ever since. I have no children but my husband has 2 from a previous marriage. I have recently had tests at the doctors and everything is OK, now waiting for results on hubby, if these are OK they will send me for a scan.
I would love to hear from anybody in a similar situation. I am so pleased I found this site, I have been lurking on it for weeks.
Posted 17 August 2006
Jayne, 46, North Lincolnshire, UK
I am a stay at home wife and mother trying for a fourth child. I have 3 children age 20, 14 and 5. Conceiving has taken longer each time, my five year old taking 7 years. I finally got pregnant with him at the age of 40 and gave birth aged 41. Life really did begin at 40 for me! I've been trying to conceive another child since for 4 years now with no success and have had perimenopause symptoms but I haven't given up yet. I'd love to hear from anyone else in a similar situation. I think this site is great as it proves I'm not crazy wanting another baby at my age!
Posted 16 August 2006
Liz, 46, Southern California, US
2 weeks ago I learned that both of my tubes are blocked. I was very relieved to learn my problem. Now I am left with only one option, which is to do invitro. The doctors here in california are not ready to take care of this predicament. They all want me to do IVF.
I wish someone could help me take care of fixing my fallopian tubes.
Posted 5 August 2006
Rebecca, 39, UK
I am 39 and will be 40 in March 07.... I can't believe it and feel that I must been asleep for a long time as I seem to have lost 10 years some where....
But anyway. I am desperate ttc. I have 4 children, ds 15, ds 7, dd 5, ds 2... I also have an dd who was born Oct 05, But died when she was only 7 weeks old in Dec 05. She had a rare genetic condition which was never picked up, I had the blood test done and it came back Low Risk, so was never offered an amnio. She was small for dates, so I ended up having lots of scans etc. But to cut a long story short she was born em C-section 4lbs 4oz. When she was 4 days old when we were told that she would die before she was one. It was the cruelest hardest thing ever.
Would love to speak to any other mums who have lost a baby and are despersate ttc - dd was to be my last but feel I have an empty space in my heart.
Posted 2 August 2006
Maree, 44, New Zealand
Hi! I am 44, will be 45 in January. I have a 21 year old daughter, who has a 2 year old son. I also have 3 sons, 19, 13 and 10. I recently remarried to a wonderful young man, he is 30. He has a 9 year old daughter. We are planning a baby of our own........so that makes 6 for us...hopefully! My husband has suffered from depression and is on medication which (until we were married, we didn’t know) has virtually killed his libido, so our chances of conceiving at the moment are low to say the least. He is coming off his medication but it is a slow process and scary for him. Hopefully I will be able to conceive soon! Your letters are very encouraging!
Posted 30 July 2006
Gill, 46, UK
Hi. My name is Gill, I live in the UK, am 46 and am working on conceiving a first baby and am really looking for a little sound advice.
I had a tubal ligation at age 30, something I now (obviously!) regret. Most of the advice I'm getting, both from a clinic and message board is that IVF is by far my best option; cheapest, and most likely to be successful considering my age and the length of time since my tubes were sealed.
But recently, I've been chatting to a friend of a friend who has conceived her first child naturally, at age 45, after having her sterilisation reversed, and now I'm all in a quandary!
I guess, the very best chance would be to have the op but go for IVF as well - but that's going to be an expensive option. I'm just wondering if anyone here could offer me some advice?
Happy to chat away to anyone and everyone also. I'm a writer, working from home. My main interests are Permaculture, archeaology, reading and cult TV.
Posted 18 July 2006
Lynette, 48, Townsville, Queensland, Australia
I have a two year old son, Thierry, who was born just before my 46th birthday, my first child.We had a great natural birth and have loved every moment of the past two years. I am now a stay -at -home mum, live in Townsville (sunny Nth Queensland) Australia, live a very healthy lifestyle, have started a Playgroup - Healthy Planet Playcircle. Would love to hear from other like minded mums.
Posted 16 July 2006
Deborah 43, Hornchurch, Essex, UK
I gave birth to my first child last autumn at the age of 42 and would really like to get in touch with other mums of a similar age. There were no antenatal classes in my area and none of my friends have young children. I would like to chat about motherhood but also my many other interests such as studying, rock music, travel, horror books and films, IT and things that people in their 40s remember!
I had no breastmilk at all and was shocked that I could get no support from anyone even when I offered to pay. The La Leche League were not helpful as they don't really offer any advice to women who have no milk. It is an issue about which I feel very, very strongly.
Thank you very much for any help you can offer me.
Posted 16 July 2006
Adriana, 41, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil
I am Adriana, I am 41, but I would like to know if there is any information around about women who have gave birth after 45, first child.
Yes, I am not trying to conceive yet, but I have a feeling I might do it in a few years.
I am pretty healthy, yet with everything in my lifehappens later.
I still look like a girl of 30. I am very flexible, and I've been thinking that if I still have this body, maybe I can conceive for the first time around or a bit after 45. But I would like to know if anyone knows where to find some info about this.
Posted 13 July 2006
Julie, 41, Aylesbury, Buckinghamshire, UK
Hi, I am currently on maternity leave with a baby girl called Caitlin who is nearly five months old. I had a really tough time last year as the pregnancy was unplanned and having two older boys of 13 and 10 thought my family was complete. I live in Aylesbury with my partner Kim and would love to hear from any mums in the area who like me may have older children with a new baby and be a bit out of practice with the baby bit. I like going to the cinema and eating out when I get the chance!
Posted 12 July 2006
Tracy, 44, Calgary, B, Canada
I am now 44 yrs. old. My baby girl will be 1 year old in 2 weeks (July 28). I conceived naturally at age 42, about 3 mos. from my 43rd birthday). Our baby was unplanned but very much wanted. I have read some of the posts here and wanted to post my own so that it might give hope to women who are trying to conceive and are over 40.
I was treated very nicely by my own GP (who admitted to being envious of me!), and my OB/GYN and his nurse. They told me my age was completely irrelevant. I did have an amnio at just over 16 weeks and even that doctor was very positive about my age. I had a medically uneventful pregnancy (just bad 24/7 morning sickness until 14 weeks). I did experience very bad hip pain in the last few months which only bothered me when in bed. Other than that I was fine.
I had to have a c-section, not due to age at all, but because I have back problems (which was FINE during my pregnancy!). I didn't like the section at all and I still grieve for my loss of a vaginal birth. I have 2 other kids - a son,15 and a daughter,12 who love our baby girl to bits. My baby is the happiest possible baby - laughing and happy about 99% of the time - she is such a joy! I can't imagine our lives without her.
I wish you all luck in your journey toward motherhood. Please ignore the majority of the information out there about becoming a mother later in life. There are so many of us that have had healthy babies.
Posted 12 July 2006
Amy, 40, Greensburg, PA, US
I am 40 years old, and yes, now I am trying for my first baby!!! My husband just had a vasectomy reversal, May 30th. I am so afraid I will not become pregnant quickly, if at all. I do feel the pressure. When I read the other stories that are posted I am very moved by them and it really helps me to keep a positive attitude. If anyone has any advice for me, please feel free to contact me. :)
Posted 3 July 2006
Joyce, Washington State, US
I am 42 yrs old and will be 43 when I deliver my 4th baby. I am going through a divorce, so I'll raise this one by myself, with my other 3 kids, (well 2, one doesn't live at home.) I'm very healthy, but a few pounds over weight and scared. You hear of all the things that could go wrong with the baby.
I am planning on having the ammio testing done, but am very scared. If anyone has has this procedure, then I would like to know what to expect. I have very bad anxiety about tests like that, (how I ever made it through 3 births, natural with no drugs, God only knows!), but right now I am really under the stress with the pregnancy, testing, and divorce, and raising 2 at home still by
myself. Any words of wisdom, encouragement, anything? Thanks!
Posted 30 June 2006
Jackie, 44, Ohio, US (Updated)
I would just like to update my message from September. Well, after a very difficult few months of pregnancy, mainly due to the baby being breech and nothing to do with my age, they tried in vain to turn the baby so that I could have a vaginal birth but the baby just wouldn't move, so I was scheduled for my first ever c-section on February 26th, 2006. On February 11th I went into labor and within an hour after arriving at the hospital had a beautiful baby girl weighing in at 6lbs 12oz. She is the best baby I have ever had, sleeping 12 hours through the night since she was 6 weeks old (and that's the truth :) The one regret I do have is that the pregnancy was not a good one and when I found out I was having a c-section I told them to tie my tubes and now a part of me really wishes I hadn't done that as I would have really loved another one. Has anyone ever heard of someone getting pregnant once they have had their tubes tied....... a long shot I
My advice out there is it best if you keep your thoughts of trying for a baby to yourself. That way you get no negative feed back. Just tell them once you are, then it's too late. Good luck everyone!!!!!!!
Posted 24 June 2006
Amanda, 44, Taunton, Somerset, UK
I am 44 years old with 3 grown up children aged between 21 and 23 years. I also have a 2 year old granddaughter. My second husband (46) and I have been trying for a baby for 2 years since I had my sterilisation reversed. Recently i have been questioning myself whether I was getting too old to have a baby and by not conceiving was nature's way of telling me so. But how lucky I was to find this site; it has changed my thoughts and realise again I'm not too old and there's lots of mums-to-be my age. I'm happy to hear from anyone who wishes to write.
Posted 24 June 2006
Kathleen, 47, US
The reason I'm writing is to ask if anyone can refer me to any research or information on Egg
Donation and Health in older woman. I married late (41) and am considering the option of egg donation. I am 47 currently (in good health) and would like to find out as much as I can before I make a decision.
There's plenty of statistics on success rates of egg transfer through clinics, but it's hard to get
information on post-partum health or complications etc. The clinics don't really track post-partum
health. If anyone can provide me with any information/suggestions I would be grateful. That
could be: physicians specializing in older births, research articles, or other woman who have gone
through the procedure in my age category. Thank you.
Posted 23 June 2006
Debbie, 40, Buckinghamshire, UK
My name is Debbie I live in Buckinghamshire England. I am nearly 41 and have just found out that I am expecting a baby. It's not my first baby, but a shock to my system, as all my children have now grown up.
I must admit... I am so scared. I have done nothing but cry for two days. There seems to be so much that can go wrong because of being the age of 40 odd and being pregnant. I thought by joining the site, I could contact other mums to be and maybe this might put my mind at rest a bit.
Posted 23 June 2006
Debra, 44, Cumbria, UK (Updated)
Just wanted to report (a little late albeit) that I gave birth after a natural conception on 20.09.05 to a 8lb 13 oz baby boy named Ben. I had already started injections for down regulating my ovaries to have donor egg treatment! On my second baseline scan, 2 weeks before treatment was scheduled I was told that I had a fetal pole and a sac but no heartbeat. I went back to my local hospital for a scan 1 week later to be told that their was a heartbeat. So after being told that my own fertility had ended by 2 ivf specialists I had conceived with a fsh of 27.8. So I wanted to give some hope to those women with elevated fsh. We all have a few good eggs left! I’m now ttc again at 44 (my birthday today) I’m using the clear blue fertility monitor and had a lh surge and ovulation pain 4 days ago, so I’ll keep you posted.
Posted 22 June 2006
Linette, 45, Arizona, US
I stumbled on your website and am very interested to talk to other moms over 45. We are lucky to already have an amazing 5-year-old boy. He and I are a week apart - I turned 40 and then he arrived - pure love. We are about to enter into Egg Donor world, but I am still hoping a miracle happens and we conceive on our own. After reading the many 45 and up mothers stories it gave me hope. My Doctors here say "no very unlikely eggs are toooo old". I would love to know more about acupuncture or other things you feel helped.
Posted 19 June 2006
Donna. 44, Washington DC, US
I am 44 and 7 weeks pregnant. This will be my first biological child, although I have a 14-year-old stepdaughter. My husband and I feel very blessed. We went through a round of fertility drugs in April, but because of a pre-planned vacation, we didn't take a thing in May. Well, I guess the relaxation was what we needed, because I confirmed my pregnancy almost 3 weeks ago when I missed my period. Because of my age, I have had some great care, and even saw a tiny heart flutter 3 days ago on an ultrasound. My doctor told me that once you see a heart beat, your chance of miscarriage drops to 5%. I am so happy!
Posted 15 June 2006
Chriss, 47, California, US
I recently turned 47 (a few weeks ago) and have been trying to conceive naturally. I had no problem getting pregnant at 42 on my honeymoon! I have a very healthy little girl and would really like to have another child. I’m ungoing acupuncture and herbs, eating healthy and avoiding caffeine. I would love to talk to another mother about her success.
Posted 12 June 2006
Robin, 46, Orange Country, California, US
I am 46 years old and had my 2nd child at the age of 45 after many years of trying and a couple of devastating (are there any other kind?) miscarriages. I have 2 boys ages 12 years and age 22 months and they are the loves of my life. I stay at home now and I find it difficult to relate to most women who have babies my baby's age because most of those mums are young enough to be my daughters! I have looked in to some mom's groups and exercise classes, but again, most of the mums are in their 20s and 30s.
I am interested in meeting up with other mum's in the Orange County area of Southern California.
Posted 15 June 2006
Nnenna, 42, Nigeria
I am Nnenna, a Nigerian lady and I am 42 trying to concieve my first pregnancy. It was recently discovered that I have a fibroid dislodging the central cavity of my womb and this causes me heavy bleeding every month, but I have been booked to have a myomectomy this month in order to remove the fibroid. What are my chances of concieving after this surgery? I would love to meet ladies who are in the same situation as I am and who can also suggest ways that I can increase my chances of conceiving after this surgery. I am a working class lady and my hobbies are reading, traveling, making new friends and listening to music.
Posted 12 June 2006
Erica, 44, Belgium
About a year ago I send a mail to 'mothers over 40', saying my husband and I would try to become pregnant. I'm 44 now. As it turned out, we didn't try it seriously till last month. And guess what? I'm in my 5th week of pregnancy now!
I just want to encourage those women who think it will be hard to concieve over 40.
This is my fourth pregnancy (second marriage) and although I was much younger when pregnant the first three times, it took longer to conceive than now. Bingo at the first hit!
I would like to write with other moms of my age (becoming 45 this year) who are pregnant and have concieved naturally. I live in Europe, Belgium.
Posted 12 June 2006
Elizabeth, 45, Arizona, US
I am 45 years old and am still quite shocked over having miscarried 2 months ago with a chemical pregnancy. My husband had a vasectomy reversal several years ago (around 2001 or 2002) and after trying for many months, we lost hope figuring that the reversal didn't take. I am a person of faith so figured it was just not meant to be. What bothers me, is that I have dreamed about a second daughter more than once. I "knew" my other 2 children before they were born through dreams; seeing their sex, features and some very specific personality traits. I know this is odd - most people would think I am nuts. I have read many times that every miscarriage no matter how young, is a child we will meet in heaven also and maybe I will just have to meet her there. I don't want to go through any excessive measures. I also am afraid of the miscarriages I hear about that are so common as we age and birth defects. My symptoms with the recent conception were intense!! Nothing like when I was in my 20's and 30's. I honestly don't know if I could deal with the added challenges of a child with Down Syndrome or other challenges. I have been charting and I do ovulate and the 2 charts following my m/c were vastly different. The first was wild and this last one incredibly consistant with stable temps and typical ov shift so I guess my body works, but the term "bad eggs" is really scaring me. What is this obsession though with getting pregnant!!! oy!! Smile. I would love to hear from anyone who is moved to write to me.
Posted 11 June 2006
Gloria, 47, Nova Scotia, Canada
My name is gloria and Im 47.I have recently been remarried and we would like to have a baby. We have tried for about a year. I had a miscarriage in October 2005 and the Dr said I couldn’t try again as some count was low (well it was low then too). I have missed my period since April! I have had 3 pregnancy tests at hospital, which are negative. I used an over the counter test a while ago and it was positive. He will not order the blood test as he feels it’s a waste of time, since the Walmart one was very faint, so Im not sure yet!! Is this normal??
Posted 2 June 2006
Tina, 43, Irvine, California, US
I'll be turning 43 this coming September 11. I'm seeing a Doctor this coming Thursday. I look and feel very pregnant. I couldn't wait to share my joy and fear at the same time with you all. I've a 15-year-old daughter, and my second daughter is 3 1/2. She will be 4 on September 13. I read some of the Mums’ articles. They sounded so positive and gave me the encouragement that I needed to hear. I would love to chat with anyone or share your stories about child bearing and child birth after 40. I wouldn't say that my third pregnancy planned, but does it matter anyway? As long as I'm happy right? I'm afraid of lots of work around the house and no one to help out. I'm very happy and my gut is telling me three is a charm.
Posted 31 May 2006
Lynda, 43, Sydney, Australia
I am 43, and the very proud first time mother of a gorgeous 14 month old boy called Connor. Due to my age, my partner and I decided to try to have a second child together relatively quickly. Unfortunately I had a miscarriage, at 12 weeks, in early April. It started the day after Connor's first birthday party where we announced our exciting news to our party guests. We are going to try again - I just have to be careful to focus on the joy Connor has brought us, rather than to fixate on having a second child.
I would love to chat with someone who started motherhood in their 40s. I live in Sydney, Australia and enjoy music, walking, reading (when I have the chance) and spoiling my pets.
Posted 30 May 2006
Rachael, 45, US
Hi, I am 45 years old, and the mother of two adopted baby daughters. I just wanted to let all of you out there know that adoption is a very, very wonderful option. Before adopting I went through several pregnancies all of which miscarried. It took a lot of work to reach the point where I could put the desire to conceive behind me - and I still haven't completely given up, as I am still having regular periods. I would love to have the experience of being pregnant - but I know that I couldn't possibly, in a million years, love my two daughters (aged 1 and 2) more if they were biologically connected to me. Adoption is a wonderful thing, and I am in the midst of doing the paperwork for a third child. By the way, I am a single woman, English, but living in America. It used to be very difficult for people to adopt in the UK - I'm not sure how it is there now. In America lots and lots of people create families through adoption. So if you are trying to conceive, do remember that if it doesn't work out, there are other, truly wonderful, ways to be parent a child.
Posted 17 May 2006
Angela, 41, UK
I am 41 years old I have never married. I did have a long-term relationship for eight years but my partner then did not support my need to have a child. I finished that relationship five years ago but I have still not found a suitable partner yet. I have been and still am devastated by my predicament, as I still want to have a child. I now do not know what to do or think. I have recently been off sick for four months with depression. I do not know now if I should give up. I have had it suggested to me that I should adopt but this is not what I want. I have looked into Donor insemination but I am not happy about the idea that a child would not know who its genetic father was. I would prefer it to be somebody who would be prepared to acknowledge their genetic role as a father. Has anybody else been in this predicament and if so what did they do to find a donor?
Posted 17 May 2006
Debbie, 46, Oxfordshire, UK
My name is Debbie. I live with my partner and our son who will be 7 at the end of June.
He was conceived naturally at the age of 39, I gave birth when I was 40. I am desperate for another baby. We started IVF when I was 43. First 6 months of clomid, when they told me I was over ovulating but still no success. I then had 3 attempts at IVF, each time 6 eggs were produced and all 6 fertilised. I had 3 eggs put back each time, but no success. The hospital will no longer treat me as I will be 46 on Sunday. I have taken Clomid the last 3 months, this month being my last. Is there anyone out there who could give me encouragement. My son means the world to me and I would so much like to have another one. We did go on the egg donor list & I have been offered 2 times but turned it down as I cant get the feelings right in my head about it, as it would not have my genes. I desperately would like one of my own naturally & would welcome any advice. I admit alcohol has been a problem over the last few months as I am not coping very well.
Posted 12 May 2006
Mithuna, 44, Sri Lanka
I am 44 years old and am 4 and a half weeks pregnant through IVF with donor eggs. My husband and I have been married for 12 years and had been trying for kids since 1998. In 2000 our fertility doctor in India adviced us to go with donor egggs. I was pregnant 3 times earlier and miscarried. Once it was a blighted ovum diagnosed at 9 weeks. The earlier time I was not taking progesterone and m/c at 5 weeeks and the last time I had bleeding on the day I was supposed to do the preg test and there was a faint line. It was negative after another week. This time round I'm trying my best with God's help to be as positive as possible but at times I am haunted by fears and I find this site very helpful. I would love to hear from other moms in similar situations.I am also hypertensive and on atenolol at the moment and there are conflicting reports of that so I think I will have to meet my physician and change the drugs. My question to moms is my breasts really hurt but I have no morning sickness at all. When does morning sickness start and is four weeks still too early? Someone please write. Best of luck to all of you.
Posted 11 May 2006
Hello, I am pregnant at 40 and we are thrilled. We tried for 6 yrs only to find out my husband had a varicele. Within 90 days after repair, we were pregnant! I have a 14-year-old child and want to have another child next year. Being a late bloomer in the affect that I finally have a man I cherish and a career I love. My first child is a great guy, but something was always missing with his jerky sperm donater that I divorced 10 years prior. Although being pregnant at 40 is of course more risk and there are a lot of more preventative tests they are all worth it. The amnio was no problem, being diabetic is a reality and being tired in a little more at 8 months’ pregnant. Being a nurse, everything I can do is done for this fella of mine. I hope fond wishes for all the 40+ moms and dads out there, it really is a blessing to be pregnant at 40.
Take care and happy birthing...Lisa
Posted 11 May 2006
Judi, 43, UK
Hi, I would like to chat to any mums over 40. We tried to conceive for over two years and I still can't belive I'm pregnant. I've been offered all the tests and opted for the nuchal scan as it was the safest. It has a 90% acurracy rate. I do feel very nervous and worried and every pain and niggle makes me scared. I have a 14 yr old daughter and have been married for 17 years. My interests are reading, gardening, camping, theatre, dogs and cookery. Hope to chat with someone soon and good luck to you all.xxx
Posted 9 May 2006
Gill, 43, Bromley, Kent, UK (Updated)
Gill gave birth to a perfect baby girl on October 31st at the age of 43. She is absolutely over the moon and would like to send her love and hope to everyone trying to conceive.
Original message: I would love to be in contact with other mothers in the same position. I am 42 and trying to conceive with my partner of 2 years. I have a daughter who will be 21 in March, I lost my son 3 years ago. He would have been 25 this year and was mentally and physically handicapped due to hospital negligence. He was an identical twin; his twin was stillborn (also hospital negligence). My partner has no children and we both would love a child of our own. Does anyone know of any good informative books about older motherhood that they can recommend? My mum is now 83 and had me at athe age of 41 after being told that she couldnt have any children!
Tracey, 40, Ohio, US
Hi! My name is Tracy and I'm 40 years old and ttc #1. My DH is 42. We've been married for 14 years and currently reside in Southeastern, Ohio. I am mommy to 3 furbabies (two pups & one kitty). I love to travel, garden, listen to good music, drink red wine, and be anywhere near an ocean. I'd like to get to know other women with the same interests who are also ttc in their 40's.
Posted 13 April 2006
Clare, 46, Utah, US
Much to my astonishment I found out last Friday that I am 7 1/2 weeks pregnant. I'm 46, and I'll be 47 in October. The baby is due November 21. I'm thrilled, as this is my first pregnancy, and I didn't think I'd ever be able to get pregnant. But I'm also scared, because I've had no morning sickness, and I've read that could be a bad sign that the baby is not firmly attached in the uterus and I may miscarry. I wondered whether you folks might know whether morning sickness might be less common in older first-time mothers like me? I have a lot of fears about this pregnancy. It is a miracle, though. There's no doubt about that. Just being able to get pregnant at 46, that is! Please feel free to post this. It may encourage others who are trying to get pregnant.
Posted 6 April 2006
Rose Marie, 47, Bloomfield, New Jersey, US
I recently married a younger man. I am currently 47 years old and have 3 children - ages 30, 28 and 21. I am in good health, don't drink or smoke and am no overweight. I would very much like to have a baby at my age. I still menstruate every 28-30 days. I would like some encouragement as to what you think my chances would be and any advice or insight. I'm getting so much negativity from family and friends.
Posted 3 April 2006
Janine, 44, California, US
I am 44 and trying to conceive my second child. My first child will be 9 this year. I have had 4 miscarriages within the last 2 and 1/2 years. One was a “chemical” pregnancy that never took, and the 3 other m/c were all in the first trimester. After many doctors and many tests, I was told that I was fine, that I am able to still have kids, but that my risk of another m/c was high due to my age. My husband was also tested for sperm and a bunch of blood tests and he is very good on all measures. I have very regular periods but I can’t seem to hold on the pregnancy past the first trimester, and they always give me the same answer why, “it must have been chromosomal problems.”
I am upset because I find that I am getting negative feedback from other moms at my son’s school, my mil, and friends who tell me I am too old to have another baby. None of which are in the medical profession. If one more person tells me I have “old eggs,” I will really say something I may regret. When it comes to pregnancy, suddenly everyone I speak to is a self proclaimed expert. I have learned to not say anything to anyone when I fall pregnant, but that is hard because then you isolate yourself.
I would have had more kids right after my first child however, my childbearing was interrupted by back surgery and eye surgery. I had to mend and now I am 100%. However, now I find myself in my early 40’s feeling like I just lost years in the blink of an eye.
I am ttc, and trying to relax and not worry so much about birth defects. For each pregnancy that ended in m/c I was overcome with fear from reading horrible statistics about mothers over 40. If I am fortunate to get pregnant and carry another baby to full term, I want to enjoy the pregnancy and not spend every moment worrying only about the negative things I read. During my last pregnancy that ended in m/c Feb 06, I had a heartbeat and was trying to decide about CVS testing vs. Amneo. It seems that CVS was preferred by my doctor because it is an early test, but that after CVS he didn’t want me to do an Amneo which is more comprehensive. This time around if I can get pregnant I think I will just wait to do the Ameno so it covers as much testing as I can have done. But since it is done much later, if you have to terminate I hear that is very traumatic. Anyone have the dilemma of CVS vs. Amneo?
Mostly, I have wondered if I am crazy to want another baby at my age. Finding Jan’s web site was wonderful. Suddenly I found myself reading about many other women who have the same desire to have another child after the age of 40. So many people have told me to be thankful I have one healthy child and just leave it at that. But I feel this need for another child, like there is a part of me that is empty. I love my child so much, but I know in my heart that I want one more.
As for my personal info, I love to read, write, and travel. I live in Southern California but lived in England and Australia when I was little. If anyone would like to correspond with me from anywhere in the world that would be wonderful.
Posted 3 April 2006
Andrea, 46, Florida, US
I'm a mother to a daughter age 29 and 4 sons ages, 24, 19, 13 and 4. I'm also a grandmother to 3 boys ages, 9, 6 and 4 yrs. I'm in a relationship with a much younger man who has no children. He wants children very much and I would love to have another child. I love being a mom! My cycles are regular and my FSH levels came back at 5.3 which is supposed to be very good. I was started on 50 mg of clomid in February and now I'm on my second round which was increased to 100 mg. Because clomid increases mucus and we need thin mucus to conceive easier I read that taking 1 baby aspirin daily helps thin the mucus or by taking Robitussin. I would love to hear from anyone who could offer more suggestions or who would just like to share something in common.
Posted 2 April 2006
Susie, 45, Bournemouth, UK
Hi from Bournemouth. I was 45 this week but can still say that I conceived when I was 44!! I’m 7 weeks pregnant & have a 17 month old toddler so will have my hands well & truly full!! But I have to say that first time around with Isabelle felt like the most amazing miracle and I loved being pregnant although it wasn’t without its worrying moments. Now, at 7 weeks I’m not sure I truly believe it yet and feel as if I’m trying not to be too excited because the 12 weeks isn’t up & I had a CVS last time at around 10 weeks which was a difficult time. But I have been praying for this for a while & so my dream has been answered! My toddler, Isabelle is SO physically active, its unbelievable – life has never been so challenging. I have done many challenging things in my life but nothing that has challenged me as much as this!! But what rewards & what indescribable feelings they engender in us. I love being a Mother & hope my energy levels continue for a while longer! We recently moved from London to Bournemouth & its been more difficult than I thought it would be, certainly in terms of making new friends. But then its only been 3 months but I do miss my friends in London especially now I’m pregnant again. I go to loads of toddler groups & classes which is great but life is busy & often other Mums have more children to look after & its just a time problem – some of them have been going to the same groups for a year or so & know each other really well & its quite hard to break in. So I’ve just offered to host an NCT coffee group in Southbourne (Bournemouth) which should be good & also I hope I’ll meet new Mums at antenatal classes. I would love to meet other Mums in Bournemouth/Poole, Dorset even & so please get in contact if you’d like to do the same.
Posted 25 March 2006
Marie, 44, UK
I'm Marie, I live in the UK. I'm 44 for another two months yet. I had my first baby in 2002, after 10 years trying and IVF. He died of Cot death, and I thought I would die too.
In 2004, we were blessed with our wonderful son. I love being a mum at 44, it is just fine!
I would love another baby with all my heart. For us it is easy, we go to a fab clinic in the Ukraine, which is really cheap, and sucess rates are fantastic.
Our only problem is fear- I can think of 200,000 reasons why it is not a good idea to be pregnant at 45, but I would love a baby. I want to do it so much, but I'm so afraid. Thankfully, because this clinic is so good, we don't have to worry about treatment working, but I wish I could just do it and feel alright about it.
If I woke up tomorrow and found out I was pregnant, I'd be over the moon,but to plan it is to think of all the reasons not to do it.
Posted 15 March 2006
Celeste, 43, US, Atlanta, Georgia, US
I'm 43 years old and trying the fertility drug Clomid. This will be my third Clomid Cycle. I've had 2 miscarriages. With one Polycystic Ovary, Fibroids and High Blood Pressure Doctors give me almost no hope of conceiving without trying IVF or an Egg Donor. Since IVF is so expensive my Husband and I are desperately trying to get pregnant without using all of our Savings even though we know it would be worth it. We're just scared of not having any funds to fall back on. I would like to talk to other Moms or Mom-to-be who have had circumstances similar to mine. It's very difficult since I don't have anyone to talk to who is my age going through the same situation. My family thinks me and my Husband should just get-over-it because I'm "too old" to think about becoming Pregnant. I don't feel I'm too old. I just need to find a way to become pregnant and successfully give birth. I know I'll be a good Mother and hopes God will bless me and my Husband with just one Angel.
Posted 14 March 2006
Vjollca, 44, Kosovo
Hi, I am 44 and not married but have a boyfriend. I like children very much, so I would like to have one of my own. After reading this site I have more hope than earlier! Any help or advice for me? I am having hormone injections because of my irregular menstrual cycle.
Posted 9 March 2006
Anne, 49, Pittsburgh, PA, USA
Hi, I just found your site. I am not sure how this works. I am 49 and want to conceive a child with my partner who is a healthy 45 year old man. I am having intermittent periods. I would like to get advice on all the ways I can boost my chances for success. I know Mike's sperm count is high so things are taken care of on that end. I had a child at 26 by natural birth and all went well. I am very fit and do a lot of outdoor sports, hiking, kayaking, mountain climbing, biking and eat a good diet, and have no health problems. I would love to get some advice and support from your members.
I saw that Sandy, code 201, was able to get pregnant at 49 and I would love to get some suggestions if she still uses your site. And Dolores, code 193, may also have received some helpful advice that maybe she would be willing to share. Hey, I am grateful for anyone who can give me some assistance. I really, really want to find a way to make this happen and can use all the prayers, well wishes, medical tips, and support anyone can give!
Take care and thanks for providing a site that is a forum for the 40+ crowd that love kids!
Posted 9 March 2006
Laurie, 48, South Dakota, US
I am 48 and have 5 children ages 29, 25, 23, 9, and 7. I have met someone very special to me who is 40 and has no children. We are trying to naturally conceive a baby of our own. I still have regular periods and consider myself to be very healthy and in great shape for my age. I am looking to chat with anyone who has any suggestions, encouragement, or that is going through something similar. It seems that most people look at me like I am crazy when I tell them what we are doing because of my age.
Posted 8 March 2006